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12月7日托福独立写作真题范文: 善有善果,恶得恶报!(下篇)

2019-12-25   浏览:    来源:新航道官网
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  持续推送近期托福考试独立写作范文解析,每篇范文都由专业写作团队编写校对,带你了解最实用的写作范文。写作能力,就是在一点一点的积累中提高的。

  独立写作题目

  Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

  Movies and television programs should present stories that good people should be rewarded and bad people should be punished.


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  写作范文

  “一”类型:

  ● 没有“选择(which)”,

  ● 没有“替代(rather than)”,

  ● 没有“比较(than; compared with)”。


Introduction


一步引入题目的核心:People’s worldview and values ← 避免依赖使用主动性的主语。 are under the influence of what the movies and TV programs show. Considering this influence, which may be overwhelming, TV producers and film makers should use screenplays in which bad people end up withbeing in a plight or the jail or with the loss of wealth or love← 找到题目里宽泛概念对应的“下义词”。 and, good people, quite the contrary, eventually have the happiness they deserve. ← 信息节奏比较快。




Body


First, child viewers and teenage viewers need the absolute righteousness. ← 中心句:主要考虑了人群(“细化人群”是论证思路的套路之一)。中心句后一两句的展开解释 → The right view on the world forms at a young age, and so does the wrong view, and once a view is shaped, it may become stubborn. 总有一句(往往也仅有一句)是长句,用来陈述核心信息 → Since we certainly would not want our children or teenagers to develop the wrong view, which could never bereversed, we certainly want the TV and movies to promote the righteousness. 当下决定不举例子(正篇作文中,需要出现举例论证,但是不是每个段落、每个理由都要举例),直接写另外一个人群的道理。In addition, adult viewers also the righteousness. 复制前半部分的论证套路 → An adult may be losing his faith in the system because he has probably received or witnessed unfair treatment. The faith needs to be retrieved. ← 关注“短句”的使用。 Such movies and TVrestore the confidence, making him see the world afresh and believe the world’s justice. ← 注意句子主语的多样性,以及句型的多样性。


If movies and TV depict the opposite case, there would be consequences. ← 中心句的关键技巧之一:笼统宽泛。接下来应对中心句里的核心内容(the opposite case和consequences)展开陈述细节。其实可以跳过“讲道理”,直接“举例子” → Any individual has the tendency to do misdeeds or even commit a crime, when the individual is informed thatjustice is sometimes absent and penalties are avoidable. It is particularly dangerous, if we acknowledge that humans have criminal genes. Meanwhile, individuals may becomeapathetic about others, when they are told that rewards are not the necessary result of their kind heart or good character. → 举例进一步,从笼统例子到具体例子 → I have seen some British TV in which bad people escape from the punishment and good people wind up with a loss, and I could not stop worrying that the British people would receive the message of those stories and eithermisconceive of the world as a flawed system that they can take advantage of or lose their belief. By contrast, I am not bothered by such anxiety when I watch American movies and Chinese TV, in which kind-hearted people always deserve the best and malicious people always suffer.




Conclusion


快速写结尾段的技巧:Introduction改一改


Since people’s worldview and values are swayed by what is on TV or in movies, those producers must be careful with what those productions show. It is the safe content that good people are rewarded and bad people punished.更多托福考试干货敬请关注新航道托福考试频道




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